How to Talk to Your Spouse-to-Be About Your Wedding Budget

There’s no denying it: money is a touchy subject. But, it’s one topic that has to be part of wedding planning, and it’ll come up over and over again. When talking finances with your future spouse, follow these six suggestions to avoid unnecessary arguments.

How to Talk about Wedding Budget

Photo by Iconic Photography 


1 Determine how much you both can contribute. 

While you might merge bank accounts after the big day, you most likely have separate, individual incomes. You’ll first have to figure out how much each of you can afford to (and are willing to) pitch in. Will you put a little more in the fund because you make more? Will your future spouse offer up his or her holiday bonus for wedding costs? Take a good, hard look at your current expenses and income.

2 Don’t pressure your partner. 

If you both want an oh-so-extravagant ballroom affair but just can’t afford it, there’s no use in nagging your significant other to splurge. Not everyone is comfortable spending a lot on a one-day event, and you should respect you fiancé’s opinions.

3 Be careful when asking about help from family. 

Not all families can pitch in for their children’s “I dos.” Some parents might be traditional, believing that the bride’s parents are responsible for all expenses. In any case, it’s best to approach the topic carefully. Start from your side: “My parents said they’d help us pay for part of the wedding!” Your partner will hopefully take the hint to see if his or her folks can help out, too.

4 Figure out how to divvy up the total budget. 

This can be a tough conversation. Does all the money go into one big bucket? Or, will your individual contribution go toward your must-dos, like your hair and makeup? Tell your S.O. your preferences, and listen to his or hers. Try to make this decision more logically than emotionally.

5 Lay out the priorities. 

Right now, you two might have very different must-haves. Maybe you’re dead-set on a fancy dress, while your fiancé would rather drop some dough on a sweet band. Or, maybe the big day really isn’t a priority at all — perhaps you’d rather save for an amazing honeymoon or a downpayment on a house. There are no right or wrong answers, but you should be honest and willing to compromise. Once you list out the priorities, you can more easily decide how much of your funds should go to each item.

6 Be honest throughout the process. 

Did you shell out a little (or a lot) more on your wedding shoes than expected? Don’t hide your slip-up — it’ll just cause a fight later on. Explain what happened and work together to find a fix. What area of the budget can you cut from to make up for extra spending?

Need more budget advice?

5 Important Money Talks to Have with Your Partner Before Your Wedding Day

How to Talk to Your Parents About Your Wedding Budget

8 Money Matters Every Couple Fights About While Wedding Planning